A Rule of Life: Building a Life That Makes Space for God

We Already Live by a Rule of Life

Whether we realise it or not, every one of us is building our life around something.

We may not call it a Rule of Life, but we all live by a pattern of habits, priorities and values that shape our days. They influence how we spend our time, our money, our energy and our attention.

Take a moment to think about your life. What fills your calendar? What occupies your thoughts? What do you naturally make time for?

The answers reveal what is shaping your life.

The question isn’t whether we have a rule of life. The question is whether that rule of life is leading us towards Jesus or simply carrying us along with the current of modern life.

Our culture has a powerful way of shaping our understanding of what a “life well lived” looks like. Success is often measured by busyness, productivity, achievement and keeping up with everyone else. Without even noticing, we can begin to adopt the values of the world around us.

The apostle Paul warns against being shaped by the culture around us. Instead, he encourages us to offer our everyday lives to God and allow Him to transform us from the inside out.

Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognise what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.

Romans 12:2 (The Message)

God’s invitation is different. Rather than being swept along by the current, He calls us to draw near to Him and build our lives around His presence. As we do, He gradually reshapes our hearts, our priorities and our desires.

The question, then, is who–or what– is doing the shaping?

Our Lives Are Always Being Shaped

Whether we realise it or not, we are being formed every day.

Our phones.
Our work.
Entertainment.
Social media.
The expectations of others.
The pace of modern life.

None of these things is necessarily wrong. But together they can become the framework around which we build our lives unless we’re intentional about building something different.

“If you don't choose the pattern that shapes your life, something else inevitably will.”

So, What Is a Rule of Life?

The phrase “Rule of Life” can sound a little intimidating, as though it’s about rules and regulations. But the word rule comes from the Latin word regula, meaning a straight stick, guide or measuring rod. It’s less about rules to obey and more about a framework to guide your life. It isn’t about adding more rules or becoming more religious. It’s about intentionally creating a framework that helps us remain close to Jesus in the middle of ordinary life.

One of the best ways to picture a Rule of Life is to think of a vine growing on a trellis.

A healthy vine naturally grows and produces fruit, but without the support of a trellis it can quickly become tangled, sprawl across the ground or grow in unhelpful directions. The trellis doesn’t produce the fruit. It simply provides the structure that enables healthy growth.

Jesus described Himself as the true vine and invited His followers to “remain” or “abide” in Him (John 15). A Rule of Life simply helps us stay connected to the One who gives life.

Like a trellis supporting a vine, a Rule of Life provides a simple framework that helps us remain close to Jesus, making space for prayer, reading the Bible, rest, worship, community and service.

Without some intentional structure, it’s easy for the pressures of everyday life to dictate our priorities. But when we thoughtfully arrange our lives around God’s presence, we create room for Him to shape us from the inside out.

We don’t become more like Jesus by following a set of rules or trying harder. Transformation comes through abiding in Him.

Over the past few months, we’ve explored practices such as slowing down, silence, solitude, surrender and abiding.

"A Rule of Life isn't another practice to add to the list. It's the gentle framework that helps those practices become part of everyday life."

Jesus Lived by Intentional Rhythms

It’s clear from the life of Jesus that He too lived to a rhythm. As a Jewish man He observed the Sabbath, festivals, synagogue worship and prayer. Yet despite the demands placed upon Him, He was never hurried. He withdrew to lonely places, enjoyed meals with friends, spent time with His disciples, rested and of course spent time with the crowds.

His life was built around intentional rhythms and His call to “Follow me” is also a call to pay attention to how He lived and to shape our lives around the rhythms that reflected His relationship with the Father.

A Rule of Life is Personal

Your rule will be shaped by the season of your life.

A parent with young children, a retired person, a student or a carer for others will all have rhythms that look different. That’s okay. A rule of life is not about copying someone else’s routine. It’s about creating a sustainable pattern that helps you stay close to Jesus. And that might take some time and experimentation to discover.

How to Start Your Own Rule of Life

Start Small

Rather than trying to build the perfect Rule of Life overnight, begin with one or two simple rhythms. As they become part of your life, you can gradually build on them.

Don’t feel you have to do all of these. They are simply ideas to help you begin. Choose one or two that fit your season of life and allow them to become a natural rhythm.

Morning – Begin with God

Let God be the first person you talk with each day. 

You could write a prayer to say each morning thanking Him for a new day full of possibility.

You could spend time working through a Bible reading plan.

You could find a quiet spot and welcome Jesus into your day before sitting in silence with Him.

Afternoon – Re-centre your heart

Here are some ideas:

Write a prayer asking God to re-centre your life on Him, asking to be aware of His presence all around you and with you as you move through your day. 

Recite the Lord’s prayer. 

Spend a few moments reflecting on your morning and thanking God for being with you.

Evening – End the day with God

Let God be the last person you speak with at night. 

Thank Him for your day.

You could recall events from the day and offer the good and low points to Him, asking Him to work in you and shape you to be more like Jesus.

You could meditate on a Psalm as you fall asleep.

Simple ideas that take up little time. These can be built on and expanded as they become a regular part of your daily rhythm.

Weekly

Set aside time for worship, Christian community and genuine rest. Sabbath reminds us that our value isn’t found in productivity but in belonging to God.

This might look like gathering with your church family, sharing a meal with friends, taking a walk in creation or simply putting work aside long enough to remember that your identity is found in Christ, not your productivity.

Allow Your Rule of Life to Grow

Finding the right rhythms at the right times is all about experimentation. Don’t be afraid to try different things and at different times.

Think of it like tending a garden. Some plants flourish when they’re first planted because the conditions are right. Others need moving, pruning or a little more care before they thrive. Our Rule of Life is much the same. You can adjust, prune and try again.

A rule of life is not written in stone. It will grow and change as your circumstances change and as you mature in your walk with Jesus. It isn’t about squeezing more spiritual activities into your day. It’s about arranging your life so it’s easier to remain close to Jesus.

A Simple Challenge

Your life is already being shaped by something.

The question is: What?

Busyness?

Hurry?

Work?

Expectations?

Or . . .

Jesus?

Every day we are becoming someone.

"A Rule of Life is simply a way of intentionally choosing who we are becoming."

Start small.

Choose one or two rhythms that help you notice Jesus throughout your day.

Experiment. Adjust. Keep returning to Him.

Because in the end, the goal isn’t a perfect Rule of Life. It’s a life rooted in Jesus, one that increasingly reflects His presence in every ordinary moment. A Rule of Life is never the destination. Jesus is.